Blogs from the Past Series #10

I HAVE A CONFESSION TO MAKE

Apr 2, '09 9:07 PM for everyone

Sabi ni Rhea, IN LOVE AKO.

SASABIHIN KO SA INYO NGAYON... IN LOVE AKO!

Actually, matagal ko na itong pinipigilan.

Matagal ko nang inililihim sa inyo.

Pero ngayon, narealize ko,

...BAKIT KO KAILANGANG ITAGO KUNG SOBRANG LUPIT NUNG NARARAMDAMAN KO?

...KUNG NAGBIBIGAY ITO SA AKIN NG WALANG HANGGANG KASIYAHAN?

...KUNG ALAM KO NA DAHIL SA KANYA, PATULOY AKONG NABUBUHAY AT NAIINSPIRE SA LAHAT NG GINAGAWA KO?

...KUNG ALAM KO NA SA BAWA'T KILOS KO, SYA ANG INIISIP KO?

...KUNG BAKIT LALONG TUMATAG ANG AKING PANANAMPALATAYA?

...KUNG SA PAGMULAT NG AKING MGA MATA SA UMAGA HANGGANG SA AKING PAGTULOG NG GABI, SIYA ANG LAMAN NG AKING PUSO'T DIWA.

...KUNG SYA ANG DAHILAN NA NARITO AKO.

...KUNG MINAHAL NIYA AKO KAHIT DI AKO PERPEKTONG TAO.

...KUNG BAKIT HINDI MAPAPANTAYAN NG MGA SALITANG MAKIKITA NYO SA BLOG ENTRY NA ITO KUNG GAANO SYA KAGALING AT KALUPIT.

... KUNG BAKIT NARARAMDAMAN KO ANG LANGIT DITO SA LUPA.

...KUNG BAKIT ALAM KONG PAGKATAPOS NG BUHAY NA ITO, ALAM KONG MAKAKASAMA KO PA RIN SYA.

I admit.

I HAVE BEEN SELFISH.

But you know what?

I SHOULDN'T BE.

Because

HIS LOVE HAS ALWAYS BEEN UNCONDITIONAL.
HE HAS ALWAYS REMAINED FAITHFUL EVEN IF WE WEREN'T.
HE HAS ALWAYS BEEN STILL.
HE HAS ALWAYS BEEN THERE TO PROTECT AND STRENGTHEN US EACH DAY.
HE HAS TURNED OUR MOURNING, SORROWS AND PAIN TO EVERLASTING JOY.

So kung tatanungin nyo ako ngayon:
BAKIT?
..bakit ako nagseserve?
..bakit ako kinikilig?
..bakit kahit ang dami kong problemang personal na mabigat, di ako sumusuko?
..bakit ako nagiging optimistic?
..bakit ako nagwoworship?
..bakit nag-eenjoy ako sa buhay?
..bakit kahit maraming di mapapalad na pangyayari sa buhay ko, nagagawa ko pang ngumiti?
..bakit nagmamahal ako?

ito lang ang sasabihin ko sa inyo.

KASI MAHAL AKO NG DIYOS.
at MAHAL RIN NYA KAYO.

Nakakakilig 'noh?

Blogs from the Past Series #9

AN OPEN LETTER TO MY LOVE

 Thursday, April 23, 2009 at 8:54pm | 

Dear God,

Hi.

I'm guessing that you've been anticipating this letter for a while now. It's a bit overdue, in fact... 21 years and 2 months, to be exact. Well, I suppose that now is the perfect time to write you this because You've been nothing but great to me.

I know that our story has not been the most perfect. I was innocently following You as a child. We used to talk a lot whenever I prayed at night in front of the grotto of our home. But then, I thought that those prayers were to be answered immediately, not thinking that they were to be answered in YOUR PERFECT TIME. As I grew up, I chose to stray from You because I thought You didn't care for me whenever those prayers seemed unheeded. And though you sent me people to hear Your word, I turned a deaf ear. Instead of listening to You, I went with non-believers -- those who turned me against You. And though I thought I owned and had control over my life then, I didn't realize how lost I was without You by my side. I chose to banish You because I thought that I can do things on my own, even at the point of challenging you to turn things around when I thought that everything in my life simply went wrong. And after challenging you, I first thought that you simply defeated me. But no, I realized that You simply won me over again and that you brought me back to the light... something that I am truly grateful for.

Since then, you've made me realize how much I was loved by you through the people I've lived my life with. With them, You've made me realize that You were always here by my side and that sometimes, I just had to feel hurt and struggle, because You wanted to me to be your strong soldier. During the times you gave me a push, You made me hold on to You all the more. And you know what? It was way better than doing things on my own, because I know that everything I did was Your work.

When I was looking for the perfect job, You've searched it for me. At first, you made me experience what I thought I wanted for my life. But though I was happy with that, I felt that you wanted me to do something more, and that I had to risk. And even if my family isn't exactly well-off or stable, You gave me a mission. Even if I haven't always received monetary compensation (well, even now) on time, I don't resent you for it. I know that You're doing this because when I receive it, You have plans for me. Once I get it, I know that You will teach me how to spend it wisely. You will tell me to invest it in You and Your plans for me, my family, my friends and the people whose lives I'll touch, which does not entail any risk because it is a product of Your love.

You've been calling me to serve You. Over the past year and a half, You've brought me to places I've never thought of going for reasons other than sheer recreation or immersion. And the best part of those trips were because I dedicated them to You. You've brought me to the less fortunate, especially to GK Villages to show me that I'm still blessed amidst my own financial crisis -- to tell me that You will provide for me. You've brought me to camps to know You more and to make me realize that You've given me so much to share to others such as my talents and skills. You've brought me to sports fests and competitions so that I could adjust my outlook in contests and to teach me to have FUN doing YOUR way. You've brought me to far-flung places to worship you and to be a witness of Your unconditional love. You've brought me to training activities to help me realize that You indeed have plans for me, and that all I had to do is be humble and listen, to follow You, even when the road I'll take will be a challenge and a struggle. Even when people doubt the sincerity of my actions, God, You stuck by me, and You've kept me still, and for that I'm eternally thankful. Most importantly, You've brought me back to the HEART OF WORSHIP and say that IT'S ALL ABOUT YOU. You've welcomed me back with open arms. You've made me feel the awesome warmth of Your undying love. You've showed me heaven on earth, the most amazing feeling I can imagine.

And though I am still waiting for your gift to me, I am contented with THIS relationship. OURS. I know that You're still planning on the space of THIS TRIANGLE that he will occupy. Right now, it's You and Me. The best part? It will NEVER be AGAINST THE WORLD, because YOU LOVE ME as much as YOU LOVE THEM ALL. And you know what, that gift can wait. You've already given me the GREATEST GIFT OF ALL -- Your son, Jesus Christ, who came to proclaim Your Kingdom, to be a brother to all of us, to die in atonement of our sins and those of the whole wide world and to be the MOST PERFECT MANIFESTATION OF YOUR LOVE.

Now that I'm taking another step up in serving You, I leave everything up to You -- all Your plans for me, all the pains that I will encounter, all the sorrows because I have learned to depend on You. I know that I should allow you to be tough for me. The enemy will linger around, but with You there, I know that everything will be okay, just as it was always meant to be. Keep me safe. Protect the people I truly love and care for, Lord God. Be with them too. And when they turn their back on you, show them the beautiful light that you've shown me.

I Love You, God. I REALLY DO.

Always,
Carmel

Blogs from the Past Series #5

Sabaw sabaw sabaw.

May 19, '09 8:37 AM for Carmel's contacts

Di ko alam kung bakit ganito ako ka-sabaw kahapon pero ayun. Pumunta kaming binondo para tulungan si Annie maghanap ng papel. Sabaw talaga yung nangyari.

Ito ay hango sa blog ni Annie. Hahaha!

ganito kasabaw si carmel...


part 1.
while waiting for a cab at sherwood place...we're random HAHAHAHA...

ng dumating na ang cab...na DAPAT sa amin titigil...

unfortunately...di tumigil sa amin...tumigil sa isang girl...

sumigaw si carmel...ng..

MUKHA MO!!!!! =))


take note: sa taft area sumigaw si carmel ha? sa kalsada! hahahahahahaha

napatingin ung girl sa amin HAHAHAHAHA


part 2
pauwi na kami...sorry naman...mahirap talaga maghanap ng cab!

anyway, si "binondo kuya" (banta, 2009) ay nakakuha ng cab para sa amin...unfortunately, di kami nakasakay agad kasi si binondo taxi ay nagmamadali dahil mahuhuli daw siya...sabi ni binondo kuya ang bagal daw namin...

leche! hahaha

anyway...so nakakita kami ng taxi near starbucks...ito nanaman si "binondo kuya" tumakbo papunta kay new taxi...sabi niya kay carmel bilisan niya....sumigaw si carmel ng MUKHA MO sabay sara pinto hahahahahahahaha

-- pano naman kasi nakalock pa yung pintuan pinapapasok na ako. sinasabi ko sa kanya nakalock pa. hahahaha. MUKHA MO  KUYA! :))


bow...ganyan lang naman kasabaw si carmel hahahaha

sorry na hahaha dyan kami masaya! hahaha

Blogs from the Past Series #3

Ate, tumatanggap po ba kayo ng McSavers?

Oct 1, '08 9:19 AM for Carmel's contacts

Yesterday, just as I arrived in DLSU, Arven asked me to accompany him to Starbucks. I gladly came with as I wanted to grab a drink too. We invited Dan and Darwin too.

We were quite indecisive as to the drink of our choice. As it was our turn, the barista asked for our orders.

Carmel: One tall caramel blended creme.
Barista: Name for the cup please
Carmel: *blink* CARAMEL.

At this point the barista was trying to contain her laughter while dictating our order to the other barista.

Dan: Jean (ganyan nya sinabi), bakit mo iniiba pangalan mo?
Darwin: Magventi nalang tayo, 25 nalang naman idadagdag.

I found myself lost in the conversation at this point.

Arven: Bakla, ang mahal!
Darwin: Konti nalang difference oh.
Arven: Sige na nga, Ate, apat po na Caramel Blended Creme. Venti. (referring to our individual orders) Tumatanggap po ba kayo ng McSavers?

Baristas: LOL (AS IN!)

HAHA.

Sabaw lang naman kami. :))

Blogs from the Past Series #1

Partially Free.
Posted by Carmel Puertollano on Jan 18, '08 7:06 AM for everyone

As the political situation has worsened and the moral ascendancy of our "leaders" has become questionable, the country was relegated to "partially free".

Why wouldn't it be?

The government has freed a criminal who hasn't served his time, the sheer volume of corruption charges has inflated, the number of political killings has risen, and what course of action does the government take? They shrug it all off and act as if nothing is happening. They only prefer to look at the good side of things but that doesn't change the fact that people are suffering and that their rights are being violated. They only care about themselves and their reputation but they do not realize that their followers aren't at all content. If they ever try to act as if they care, it doesn't really manifest (or I'm just apathetic). In extreme cases, it's as if they drugged people and make them blindly follow. With a government such as ours, they only care for what they can reap from their relationship with the greater powers, like the US.
My litelec professor told me yesterday that I should be in the government because I'm more of a dove rather than a hawk. A statement I found, well, hard to take in. I know for one that I'm not the most diplomatic person in the world, nor have I ever attempted to do so. There are just things that I find unacceptable like Catholics (like my family), who discriminate against other religions. I guess that's why I never was firm with my beliefs -- I find my background leaning towards unhealthy fundamentalism which results into various misconceptions about religions that breed chaos (and that is why the Philippines is so damn f-ed up). What I'm trying to say is, we have to see things in different perspectives and that we should learn to respect how they are. We can't always expect them to do some things out of the goodness of their hearts all the time, nor can we expect them to believe in what we believe.

People have convictions that they fight for, and that's something we can never change about human nature. We can never have things go our way.