The sun will shine on this side of my world.

Monday, November 15, 2010

When we have problems, we don’t feel the kindness of God.
But it doesn’t mean that God isn’t kind.
It just means it’s nighttime, but God’s kindness is still shining.
In another part of your world, it’s daytime!
 Soon, your night will pass. Your trials will pass. Your burdens will pass. And you’ll see the first rays of the morning sun break through the darkness of your problems.
- Bo Sanchez 
I'm not having the best start to my day today, unlike other days when I feel extremely happy in the morning. 
Sometimes, my Tita makes it a habit to point out all the bad things that are happening to us and our family, and sometimes it just really takes a toll on me. Like every November, she makes it a point to remind us that Christmas this year won't be as good as Christmas in 1995 or 1996, during the better days, I must say. I can't blame her though. She has already sacrificed so much.
Years ago, I always looked forward to this time of the year, especially when school got too busy and when my parents decided to part ways. I always wanted it to be Christmas, simply because I got to spend more time with my Lolo and Lola, who really just show their love so much (and the gifts I got from my ninongs and ninangs. Haha.). In 1997, my Lola passed away a few days after Christmas, and up to now, memories of that day still flash through my mind so vividly. Ten years later, my Lolo suffered a stroke which ultimately led to his demise the following year. Christmases since then weren't exactly occasions I looked forward to.me fun or like what they used to, I still can't answer the hows and whys and what-ifs. Sometimes, it just pierces my heart knowing that right now, I am powerless to change things. I feel like even if I have the perfect Christmas celebration outlined in my mind, I really can't share it, and it crushes me. 
I used to question God a lot. Why me? Haven't I suffered enough? I'm so young to have to go through all these things. Don't you love me?
I know that in terms of my faith, I'm still taking baby steps, but I'm hoping that I'd be able to truly walk with Him to answer the longings of my heart. A few weeks ago, I went to mass. And I really can't help but cry. God sent me a message on that day and I could never forget it. 
Sometimes, you just have to bear your cross in order for you to grow in My love, and when you grow in My love, you can share it with the world.
I do not know if you believe in callings, but I do. Somehow, I could never fully understand why God allowed me to go full time despite all the challenges I needed to face. But then again, I believe that this is where I am able to share the love, and someday, soon, maybe my family will experience that kind of love from me too. I just hope that it the sun will shine on this side of my world. :)  

Kung ang lahat ng Pilipino ba ay tulad mo, gaganda ba ang bansa? (a reflection)

Monday, May 31, 2010

Yesterday, just in any other talk he has conducted, Kuya Mari asked the question: "Kung ang lahat ng Pilipino ba ay tulad mo, gaganda ba ang bansa?" And just as in any instance he has asked this question, I could also think of reasons why I could say YES, but I could also think of reason why I could say NO.

Why, you might ask?

I could say yes simply because I have a vision of a better Philippines. I believe that this country has far too much potential and I would like to harness these potentials so that we can make this country better. Truly, if Filipinos thought this way, I'm sure that we will be able to rise.

But in accepting the fact that the Philippines will be a great country if all Filipinos were like me, I believe that it entails a certain posture. I have asked myself so many times, am I a good role model for Filipinos to follow?

Posing this question, I could enumerate a lot of reasons why I am not the best model. I am a flawed and broken person, and in humbly accepting the fact that I am flawed, I believe that there are things about me that Filipinos should not even try replicating. I am sure that my weaknesses will not be good to follow. And I know in myself that I should start changing if I want change.

Which is the good thing about my situation -- It turns the negative into a positive. I am broken, but I could rise and be a stronger person. I am flawed but I can work on being the perfect child that God always wanted me to be. I can change and will be the change I want to see in this country.

Hence, if you ask me now, kung ang lahat ng Pilipino ba ay tulad mo, gaganda ba ang bansa? I wouldn't say yes -- but I wouldn't say no either. I would say, not yet. I will be. :)

 

 

Posted via web from Carmel

is destressing with dhang and ate cla. :-)

Sunday, March 21, 2010

Pilipinas kong MAHAL. :-)

Saturday, March 20, 2010

one of my favorite prayers

Monday, March 8, 2010

Lord, let me be the change I want to see
To do with strength and wisdom
All that needs to be done
And become the hope that I can be
Set me free from my fears and hesitations
Grant me the courage and humility
Fill me with spirit to face the challenge
And start the change I long to see.
Even if I’m not the light
I can be the spark
In faith, service and communion
Let us start the change we want to see
The change that begins with me.

Posted via web from carmelpuertollano's posterous

'...right by Your side I'll stay, worshipping you all day. I will live&die for You. Everything I will do for heaven is here in my heart.'

Thursday, March 4, 2010

My candidates for the upcoming elections.

Wednesday, March 3, 2010

Remember a few months ago, I blogged about who I'm voting for? Well, there were some of them whom I thought I was sure of -- particularly Liza Maza and Satur Ocampo. However, after they've finally decided to be guest candidates under Money Manny Villarroyo's party, I've decided to drop them. Also, I couldn't believe that someone who used to hate Marcos with a passion would run under the same banner as his son. Oh well. That's politics for you. 

The good  thing about my posting that blog, however, was that some candidates actually made an effort to approach me so that I could get to know them better. Alex Lacson (whom I am most sure of voting!), Ruffy Biazon, and to some extent, TG Guingona, made their plans known to me. I felt that my own vote counts and considering that they couldn't really reach every single Filipino, I was siquite fortunate to have had that opportunity to ask them personally about certain aspects of their programs  current engagements. I've also done my research on Sonia Roco, Martin Bautista and Yasmin Busran-Lao. I'm voting for them :) Sonia Roco on the grounds of women empowerment, Martin Bautista because he has the best program for health (considering, of course that he's a doctor), and Yasmin Busran-Lao because I believe that in order to achieve true peace in Mindanao, they need a representative in the legislative process. :) 

I'm not voting for Danny Lim, though. So it's not exactly SLAMAT LORRRD. And yes, I'm under voting for senate and councilors.
So here's my almost final list. 

  • President: Noynoy Aquino
  • Vice President: Mar Roxas
  • Senators 
    • Sonia Roco
    • Neric Acosta 
    • Martin Bautista 
    • Alex Lacson 
    • TG Guingona
    • Yasmin Busran-Lao
    • Serge Osmena (guest candidate) 
    • Ruffy Biazon
    • Ralph Recto 
    • Risa Hontiveros 
    • Frank Drilon
  • Mayor: Herbert Bautista
  • Vice Mayor: Joy Belmonte
  • Congresswoman: Vivienne Tan
  • Councilor
    •  Sep Juico
  •  Party list: None!
And yes, Sep is the only candidate I'm considering so far. The others seem a little too trapo for me. At least I'm confident in these choices.

And yes, halos lahat LP. Haha! :)